Young
King Arthur was ambushed and imprisoned by the monarch of a neighbouring
kingdom. The monarch could have killed him, but was moved by Arthur's youthful
happiness. So he offered him freedom, as long as he could answer a very
difficult question. Arthur would have a year to figure out the answer; if,
after a year, he still had no answer, he would be killed.
The question was: What do women really want?
Such
a question would perplex even the most knowledgable man, and, to young Arthur,
it seemed an impossible query.
Well, since it was better than death, he
accepted the monarch's proposition to have an answer by year's end. He returned
to his kingdom and began to consult everybody: the princesses, the prostitutes,
the priests, but no one could answer the question.
What
most people did tell him was to consult the old witch, as only she would know
the answer.
The
price would be high, since the witch was famous throughout the kingdom for the
exorbitant prices she charged.
The
last day of the year arrived and Arthur had no alternative but to talk to the
witch. She agreed to answer his question, but he'd have to accept her price
first:
The
old witch wanted to marry Gawain, the most noble of the Knights of the Round
Table and Arthur's closest friend!
Young
Arthur was horrified: she was hunch-backed and awfully hideous, had only one
tooth, smelled like sewage water, often made obscene noises...
He
had never run across such a repugnant creature. He refused to force his friend
to marry her and have to endure such a burden.
Gawain, upon learning of the proposal, spoke
with Arthur. He told him that nothing was too big a sacrifice compared to
Arthur's life and the preservation of the Round Table.
Hence,
their wedding was proclaimed, and the witch answered Arthur's question:
"What
a woman really wants is to be able to be in charge of her own life."
Everyone
instantly knew that the witch had uttered a great truth and that Arthur's life
would be spared. And so it went. The neighbouring monarch spared Arthur's life
and granted him total freedom.
What a wedding Gawain and the witch had!
Arthur was torn between relief and anguish. Gawain was proper as always, gentle
and courteous. The old witch put her worst manners on display. She ate with her
hands, belched and farted, and made everyone uncomfortable.
The
wedding night approached: Gawain, steeling himself for a horrific night,
entered the bedroom. What a sight awaited! The most beautiful woman he'd ever
seen lay before him! Gawain was astounded and asked what had happened.
The beauty replied that since he had been so
kind to her (when she'd been a witch), half the time she would be her horrible,
deformed self, and the other half, she would be her beautiful maiden self.
Which would he want her to be during the day
and which during the night?
What
a cruel question? Gawain began to think of his predicament:
During
the day a beautiful woman to show off to his friends, but at night, in the
privacy of his home, an old spooky witch?
Or would he prefer having by day a hideous
witch, but by night a beautiful woman with whom to enjoy many intimate moments?
What
would you do?
What
Gawain chose follows below, but don't read until you've made your own choice.
Noble
Gawain replied that he would let her choose for herself.
Upon hearing this, she announced that she
would be beautiful all the time, because he had respected her and had let her
be in charge of her own life.
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